求各位大虾帮忙,小弟问我题,作为大哥哥的我...改下..

题目Some people believe that people should keep all the money they earned. However, others believe that it is an obligation to pay tax to the state. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion
  This world have many contries.It is have different laws and obligation and any more.but the same of one is contribution government's revenue,it is our's  responsibility.However,in my opinion,every people should contribution to the government's income for the following reason.
  Frist of all.Many larger companys contributes much to government's economic.For example, The government of Britain collect a large sum of money from company sales tax to pay for its education facility and pubilc charitable organization,In deed, many people think that they get all the money is correct be behaviour,In other words, They don't have selfishness.On the contrary,These people cause many social problem,such as evade taxation,Because there is a big beneficial of companys
   Evade tax brings tax-evader a lot of psychological disadvantage,a growing number of people challenge the existing laws that these people sent to prison.Furthermore,the money is used to help that they want to help's people,a litte change their's life and it stimulates their create better life.In addition ,more and more people trust the government control.If we don't pay tax,the government might more serious ways to collect money,such as world war,a number of people is died in the war.
   To sum up.I think every people should pay tax.The companys makes a large contribution to the government economic.However, evade tax's people is must punished to go to the jail.There is evidence showing pay tax is contribution to the government.In other words,pay tax is contribution to your motherland,so I approve of pay tax to the state